tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post8875484938514108953..comments2023-05-14T21:11:23.699-04:00Comments on CHEESEBURGER BROWN: Story Wallah: And Bananas for All - Part SixCheeseburger Brownhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comBlogger22125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-81066907508945252222007-12-04T10:36:00.000-05:002007-12-04T10:36:00.000-05:00anon: I tried to make that sentence work too, but...anon: I tried to make that sentence work too, but since they were talking about Mike's cart -- and it was most definitely moving -- I figured it was a typo.<BR/><BR/>As for "hone in", I think it's only correct because so many people have been saying it in the past ten years :)<BR/><BR/>CBB: hooray for the end of the crazy weeks! Enjoy the quiet of the office; I know what a difference it makes when you don't have someone breathing down your neck in micromanagement mode.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-69792953411967903382007-12-03T15:48:00.000-05:002007-12-03T15:48:00.000-05:00Dear Sheik,Thanks for the notes.I find that action...Dear Sheik,<BR/><BR/>Thanks for the notes.<BR/><BR/>I find that action sequences in general require a lot of careful combing to a) make sense, and b) to be clear. This particularly climax action sequence really could have done with more care in that regard. I <I>hate</I> being rushed, but that's what life has been like lately.<BR/><BR/>Chapter 1 of the next story should go up on Wednesday. It's deadline day for me today at work so I won't get anything done (though the illustration is finished) until everyone is on their way to the airport and out of my hair for a few days.<BR/><BR/>I'm so happy: the horror and stress of the last eight weeks is <I>almost over!</I><BR/><BR/>Love,<BR/>Cheeseburger BrownCheeseburger Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-30293466020094898282007-12-03T15:35:00.000-05:002007-12-03T15:35:00.000-05:00"Hone in" is correct. Also, I took "a still cart o..."Hone in" is correct. Also, I took "a still cart on the field" to mean "there is a cart on the field which is not moving". <BR/><BR/>I share your confusion regarding Mike getting on the plane, however. There were a few things that were difficult to picture in that scene.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-41994782968820888362007-12-03T14:33:00.000-05:002007-12-03T14:33:00.000-05:00I was re-reading to stave off withdrawal, and foun...I was re-reading to stave off withdrawal, and found a few nitpicks. First, grammar:<BR/><BR/>The phrase "hone in" should be "home in" (everyone does this, it seems).<BR/><BR/>"It squatted in the shadow of a tall plywood wall" should probably be "They squatted..." since it refers to two trailers.<BR/><BR/>"Is it just me, or is there a still cart on the field?"<BR/><BR/>Should that be "still a cart"?<BR/><BR/>Also, I noticed one place where "tarmac" is spelled "tarmack".<BR/><BR/>Oh, and near the end their situation is described as "warm and dry", but the air is so cold that their breath is condensing. This wouldn't seem ideal for transporting fruit either, but I'm no grocery expert.<BR/><BR/>Also, a continuity issue: Mike jumps from the cart and hangs from the plane to release the ramp, and the next minute he's scrambling up to the hood of the cart. I thought at first he'd fallen back in when the ramp came down, but that seems unlikely because the cart swerved out of the way when that happened.<BR/><BR/>The matter of whether a golf cart -- even at top speed -- can keep up with an accelerating jet at takeoff... well, I can suspend enough disbelief for that ;)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-26175838371700051802007-12-03T11:40:00.000-05:002007-12-03T11:40:00.000-05:00Oops. I forgot about those guys.Oops. I forgot about those guys.Markhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08722639974320971726noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-22884710529054092462007-12-02T03:22:00.000-05:002007-12-02T03:22:00.000-05:00There were men aboard (you know, before the chimps...There were men aboard (you know, before the chimps threw them out). Certainly they were supposed to survive the trip; the only question is whether Mike and Company will have to ration their oxygen based on the increased demand.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-68925098408630562822007-11-30T12:00:00.000-05:002007-11-30T12:00:00.000-05:00Nice wrap-up for this part of Mike's story. I know...Nice wrap-up for this part of Mike's story. I know the craft would be kept at a temperature the simians could survive, but what about oxygen? Do bananas need it on a space voyage? Just wondering.<BR/><BR/>Can't wait for the Christmas story.Markhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08722639974320971726noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-50984012935216217492007-11-30T11:16:00.000-05:002007-11-30T11:16:00.000-05:00Ah, the anticipation is too much.Time for repeated...Ah, the anticipation is too much.<BR/><BR/>Time for repeated viewings of <I>KISS Saves Santa</I> to pass the time...Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-63109740603624421492007-11-30T07:52:00.000-05:002007-11-30T07:52:00.000-05:00Dear Dan,Yes, definitely.Love,Cheeseburger BrownDear Dan,<BR/><BR/>Yes, definitely.<BR/><BR/>Love,<BR/>Cheeseburger BrownCheeseburger Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-33616905865413248812007-11-30T02:02:00.000-05:002007-11-30T02:02:00.000-05:00Hey CBB,My kids loved "Pink Santa" last year. I'm...Hey CBB,<BR/><BR/>My kids loved "Pink Santa" last year. I'm not quite ready to obliterate the myth just yet, though. Will this one be myth and kid safe so I can read it to them as well?<BR/><BR/>THE DanimalDanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01657614872089173887noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-86623145879416739252007-11-29T13:59:00.000-05:002007-11-29T13:59:00.000-05:00the woman = foe of Dr. Zoran?the woman = foe of Dr. Zoran?Orick of Torontohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07151258407218493474noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-7832676268844802452007-11-29T10:25:00.000-05:002007-11-29T10:25:00.000-05:00"Five bucks says it's Cassandra."I'll take that be..."Five bucks says it's Cassandra."<BR/><BR/>I'll take that bet. :)Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-69627378428737417942007-11-29T02:59:00.000-05:002007-11-29T02:59:00.000-05:00I recognized Tenny right away, when he said Prince...I recognized Tenny right away, when he said Prince I figured it was the Shah's son. The only other royalty we know that he knows is the current princes of england, and they would have much better understood and respected his knowledge for security.<BR/><BR/>Monkeys haven't been to space for a LOOOOOOOOOONG time, and I don't know what the heck kind of cargo plane they're flying that doesn't involve a rocket booster to get it up to escape velocity. Must be a vastly superior Long technology thing, some kind of no-visible-means-of-lift thing.<BR/><BR/>[shifty eyes]Professionally, I feel the need to inform you all that while science-fiction is interesting and oftentimes good at foretelling, computers will never be able to replace a human being in the cockpit. Also, teleportation is categorically unsafe.[/shifty eyes]<BR/><BR/>TRHTeddyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06429915965397673079noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-74777467406246395782007-11-28T23:33:00.000-05:002007-11-28T23:33:00.000-05:00I'm still waiting to find out whether the Shah is ...I'm still waiting to find out whether the Shah is Long (since CBB was so cryptic about it). If he is, then the very nature of Bahram is in question. Of course the very fact that the Shadow Shippers -- who served Zeus previously -- are apparently <I>working for</I> in the whole Siraj family, makes me lean even further in that direction... of course that would mean that Lallo, assuming he still lives, would know the truth about his old friend by now as well.<BR/><BR/>And who's the woman? Five bucks says it's Cassandra (i.e. not nearly as certain as I was about Jeremiah).<BR/><BR/>Yay for Santas in Space! I wonder if we'll see Chloe on Mars... and I really hope Mike makes it back to Sarah.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-84258152688944173672007-11-28T21:35:00.000-05:002007-11-28T21:35:00.000-05:00Dear Sheik,Though not covered in And Bananas for A...Dear Sheik,<BR/><BR/>Though not covered in <I>And Bananas for All</I>, I can safely assure you that the ultimate voyage to Mars can't be accomplished in the vehicle they're currently in: they will trade up at a waystation on the Moon's far side, but that's another story and will be told another time.<BR/><BR/>Dear SaintPeter,<BR/><BR/>Hey, thanks. I know this was not a particularly dense story to stretch over a month and a half, but I'm happy if at least it struck the right chord with some people.<BR/><BR/>Dear Orick,<BR/><BR/>Well, there's always more story to be told. I recall explaing to my brother a few months ago: in a sense, all of the events have already happened on the grossest scale -- like a historian, I get to chose to frame certain moments of the action in a sequence of events that extends into the past and continues to unfold into the future.<BR/><BR/>...Which is a roundabout way of saying we will eventually find out, but it's hard to say in what order and at what level of detail. I'm sure some of the events will at least earn a mention in the next story.<BR/><BR/>Dear gt281,<BR/><BR/>Yes, bananas and cheese do go together. I think it has to be the right cheese, though -- cheddar wouldn't cut the mustard, in my opinion. Gouda, maybe?<BR/><BR/>Love,<BR/>Cheeseburger BrownCheeseburger Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-54391330274852536442007-11-28T20:29:00.000-05:002007-11-28T20:29:00.000-05:00Nicely done….. Imaginative phrasing….And now I kno...Nicely done….. Imaginative phrasing….<BR/>And now I know what the title means….<BR/>Just one question….do bananas and cheese go together well??.....if I had a Richter scale,,I’d give it an 81/2 or 9,, (there are no 10s)….<BR/>Is that a banana in your pocket or are you just glad to hear from me again??..(I know,, old joke)<BR/>Onward to ‘Santa sleighs a reindeer’……..gt281https://www.blogger.com/profile/15727109065110413150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-55993772859825170422007-11-28T17:08:00.000-05:002007-11-28T17:08:00.000-05:00Also: Simon, Bahram is the son of the Shah of Anwa...Also: Simon, Bahram is the son of the Shah of Anwar -- in his youth, he was the one who first recruited Lallo into the Shah's services in the 1960s.<BR/><BR/>Love,<BR/>Cheeseburger BrownCheeseburger Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-29161030863389980162007-11-28T17:05:00.000-05:002007-11-28T17:05:00.000-05:00Dear all,Small note: there will more likely than n...Dear all,<BR/><BR/>Small note: there will more likely than not be at least some small points of connection between the events described in this story and the events described in the next story, <I>One Small Step for Santa</I>.<BR/><BR/>Love,<BR/>Cheeseburger BrownCheeseburger Brownhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01384136287767500794noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-5800736120960530232007-11-28T16:53:00.000-05:002007-11-28T16:53:00.000-05:00Awesome high note to end on, CBB. (Turns out I *c...Awesome high note to end on, CBB. (Turns out I *can* comment from work! Huzzah!)<BR/><BR/>I loved the feeling I got when I realised who Tenny was. I seem to have forgotten the identity of Bahram, but I'm sure Sheik or Teddy will remind me...<BR/><BR/>It seems that Mike's spaceship-naming-worthy act is still some time in the future... but you know, I'm left wondering at the serendipity of the presence of the bananas amidst a motley crew of simian stowaways. Could there *possibly* have been some element of design to that, even considering the relative difficulty of getting on board? I have to wonder that.<BR/><BR/>Ah well, all will be known in due time. Or, hopefully enough will be known to sate the masses. Looking forward to the Chrstmas story!Simonhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06946639624660520997noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-21552616497555171232007-11-28T16:12:00.000-05:002007-11-28T16:12:00.000-05:00I agree, we need a sequel to this right away. Othe...I agree, we need a sequel to this right away. Otherwise I will be constantly thinking about what Mike and his band makes out of the spaceship.Orick of Torontohttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07151258407218493474noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-5309403013196435572007-11-28T15:02:00.000-05:002007-11-28T15:02:00.000-05:00Oh. Emm. Gee.You fullfil my expectation and then l...Oh. Emm. Gee.<BR/><BR/>You fullfil my expectation and then leave me gasping for more!<BR/><BR/>Bravo, I say. Bravo!SaintPeterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02064605142705446251noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-16435271.post-8890807455591551032007-11-28T14:18:00.000-05:002007-11-28T14:18:00.000-05:00Dang. I didn't expect Bahram and Tenny to show up...Dang. I didn't expect Bahram and Tenny to show up here... together, no less! I gather Mr. Smith has finally learned more about the shadow shippers.<BR/><BR/><I>"Mike, feeling like Santa Claus..."</I><BR/><BR/>I love it.<BR/><BR/>Of course when they realize they're not headed for the Sky Banana after all, they may be a bit surprised. Here's to the beginnings of the Little People at the Martian colony, and perhaps a bit more backstory on Executive origins!<BR/><BR/>I can't wait.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.com