Wednesday 8 June 2011

The Automatic Marlboro - Section III, sub-section (e)


The Automatic Marlboro is a science-fiction novelette told in twelve parts, posted serially by me, your host intoxicated by the giddy glory of spring, Cheeseburger Brown. This is the final installment.

Chapters:
1a|1b |1c|2a|2b|2c|2d|3a|3b|3c|3d|3e

Connected stories: Simon of Space, Life & Taxes, Tim, Destroyer of Worlds

And now, the conclusion:



THE AUTOMATIC MARLBORO - SECTION III

e)

Blindfolded, we descend. I stumble on the decline but am righted by very strong hands.

"Pulse, where are you?"

"I'm right here, man."

"Me too," says Air.

My breath hitches: Pulse and I have not been caught up in some random sweep...if Air is here, it can only be about the project. Where the Zorannic Centre at the University of Nirgal has been militarized by paperwork, we are apparently having it done unto us the old-fashioned way: by force. I wonder if we are being disappeared. Does that happen to real people? I mean, I accept that it could happen to me -- but could it really happen to natives like Pulse and Air?

When people are disappeared in real life, is it done with firearms? Or do they have some sort of special injection?

My bowels groan.

I gasp as the blindfold is whisked off my head. I blink and squint, my vision runny. I think I have a concussion. I wonder if I'm dreaming because it seems to me as though we're back in the lab.

A figure bears down on me: camouflage fatigues, riot armour, breathing mask, hard eyes. "Dr. Marlboro Kleenex Siemens, Director of the University Zorannic Maintenance Centre at Huo Hsing?"

I manage to nod.

"Sir," says the military man as he reaches up and removes his face; "my name is Jeremiah. Strain five."

The lieutenant at his side follows suit. "Finnimbrun, twenty-first strain."

"Socrates, strain eighteen."

"Flatten, sir, of the seventh strain."

"Symmetry three."

"Curie Twentieth, sir."

The entire platoon is composed of Zorannic robots in disguise. Their eyes are holograms swimming in goggles, peeled away and put aside with the breathing masks and helmets. Curie removes the blindfolds from Air and Pulse who gape to confirm what they've heard. "Holy mung, I thought the campus was actually overrun with soldiers!" cries Pulse.

"It is," says Jeremiah gravely.

"They seek you, but we have polluted their intelligence," adds Flatten. "The delay will not be long, however. Time drains without regard."

"The Antilogue tells us riddles of your invention," says Curie. "What is the truth of it?"

Pulse swallows and nods. "It's a self-contained robot re-propagation apparatus, Ms. Curie." He turns and gestures toward the darkened space between the towers of boxes where the apparatus is nestled, the work lamps dim and our benches shoved aside. The borders of the thing bristle with outstretched fingers. "I call it the Automatic Marlboro," he proclaims...
To read the rest of this story, buy it now from Amazon for just $2.99!

21 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hurray! _So_ fornicated! :)

Simon said...

Ah, I got a little giddy at seeing the return there of Jeremiah. Or, perhaps one of his earliest appearances, really.

A part of me really wants to wrap my head fully around the entire mythos that's been built up here around the Zorannics. But the timeline is so very long, and of course the stories are interspersed at irregular spots along its meandering length, that I mostly content myself with enjoying the current tale and relishing whatever interweavings or subtle references I manage to grok in the moment. I'm happy with that.

Was also nice to see a relatively happy ending to the tale... conflagrations, uprisings, and military suppression notwithstanding.

Dan said...

And we'll have fun, fun, fun, now the Zorannics took the Auto-Marly away!

Another well-spun yarn!

THE Danimal

Joshua Benjamin said...

Amazing! Loved the whole story, especially the end.

Joshua Benjamin said...

@Simon: I believe the earliest appearance of Jeremiah would be in Life & Taxes. Unless of course you consider Jesus and the Robot. It is difficult to decide which counts as the 'earliest' since, well... Time is weird. :)

Sheik Yerbouti said...

What Simon said -- though I'll keep trying.

It's funny how CBB's self-descriptive opener can refer either to some aspect of the story or to his current life circumstances; I enjoy trying to guess which is which before diving into the current chapter.

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Anonymous,

I thought I'd successfully defornicated their situation! How happy do these happy endings need to be, anyway?

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Simon,

Was also nice to see a relatively happy ending to the tale... conflagrations, uprisings, and military suppression notwithstanding.

Thanks kindly. The story was originally designed to end on a down note, but it found some momentum of its own during the writing that resisted tragedy.

A part of me really wants to wrap my head fully around the entire mythos that's been built up here around the Zorannics...

Though it may be no real consolation it will one day be true that the conclusion of THE SECRET MATHEMATIC will sort of serve as a capstone in this respect, in laying the foundation of the Zorannic mythology as you say.

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Dan,

Thank you! And, er, thanks for the ear-worm, I guess, too...

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Joshua,

I believe the earliest appearance of Jeremiah would be in Life & Taxes. Unless of course you consider Jesus and the Robot. It is difficult to decide which counts as the 'earliest' ...

Don't forget his cameos in THE SECRET MATHEMATIC as a preserved head and then, later, as part of Lallo's hybrid body.

Jeremiah's everywhere!

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Sheik,

It's funny how CBB's self-descriptive opener can refer either to some aspect of the story or to his current life circumstances; I enjoy trying to guess which is which before diving into the current chapter.

Yeah, I guess it is sort of random, isn't it? What it actually says in my posts is "your [SOMETHING-SOMETHING] host" and then I make my substitution at the last moment as I'm pasting it into the Internet. One of these days I'll probably bungle it and you'll just see "SOMETHING-SOMETHING" there, no doubt.

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Simon said...

... it will one day be true that the conclusion of THE SECRET MATHEMATIC will sort of serve as a capstone in this respect...

So we'll finally get to find out just what the heck a Mississauga Machine is??! Nice.

What I think I'll end up doing is making sure I have all the published books to hand, wait for TSM to come to a conclusion, then read everything you've tossed independently into print. I think that would be very satisfying.

**note to self: get ELEVEN ELECTRIC LIES

Teddy said...

SOMETHING-SOMETHING DARK SIDE!

Umm...sorry...something just sort of came over me all of a sudden.

Anywho, what's next on the docket?

TRH

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Simon,

So we'll finally get to find out just what the heck a Mississauga Machine is??! Nice.

Yes, I can say without reservation that the origin and function of the fabled Mississauga Machine will be made explicit in THE SECRET MATHEMATIC. It would be fair to say events hinge on it.

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

Cheeseburger Brown said...

Dear Teddy,

Anywho, what's next on the docket?

As I mentioned earlier in the commentary, this story diverged from its intended plot target and became something rather different than the original concept.

I am now developing the "B Side" of this story, so to speak...the story this one never became, but was intended to be.

In order to avoid fouling the timeline, I have recast the alternative story into slightly different circumstances, with slightly different characters, at a slightly different time in Martian history.

And, in order to avoid repeating myself, I am intending this for this new work to be published traditionally -- and so until I get my rejection letter it will not run on this blog.

The next public telling I haven't decided -- I made a lot of notes while away on holiday, so there are several threads to pick up on. I think it's likely that we'll be sticking with Mars for a spell.

I'm also continuing to develop the ending of THE SECRET MATHEMATIC, of course, but because it's coming out in a non-linear fashion I can't say for sure when the next chapter will reach you.

So...that's not exactly a "schedule" but it's what I can report.

Yours,
Cheeseburger Brown

gl. said...

YAY! good story! i love how they're all holding hands at the end.

i was a bit surprised they didn't leave with the robots.
"Perhaps we may not need you," agrees Jeremiah, his black lenses reflecting our faces back to us. "But we still want you." aaaawwwwwwww! i hope we see them together again at some point!

SaintPeter said...

A News Story Straight from the Burgerverse (And Canada):
http://www.xtra.ca/public/Toronto/Rainbows_banned_at_Mississauga_Catholic_school-10262.aspx

fooburger said...

I like it!
Nazis and robots really can't lose.. :)
Hoping to hear more about your professional publication in the future!

Sheik Yerbouti said...

Okay, that kind of thing should come with a NSFW warning (ads, etc).

Big t said...

Nice work CBB. Thank you.

Mark said...

Wonderful addition to the Zorannic mythos. Is it wrong that Marlboro reminded me a bit of Tim, Destroyer of Worlds?

I think somehow I never read the most recent TSM entries, because I could not remember enough of the previous happenings to follow along after only a few paragraphs. I need to remedy that.

For some reason I'm able to comment at work today. That is, IF this thing doesn't puke it up after I click the orange button.